Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Randomize