I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
