i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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