I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
3pm strippers are depressing
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
