And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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