Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
