i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
that's an acceptable place to lick
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
