you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
