ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
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