There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
