don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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