JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize