I smell stomach acid.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
