he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
