I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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