therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Is it because I queefed?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
