Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
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