he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I love you.
Bad choice
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize