no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
