so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
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Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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