Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
