doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
