doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
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