I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
