Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
