I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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