So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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