If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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