It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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