I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
