Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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