I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
