You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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