I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
