Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
