So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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