we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Randomize
