How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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