eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer