where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize