This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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