hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
