low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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