But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
