The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
