btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Randomize
