I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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