Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
