I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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