you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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